oh...that was easier...

Three times in four days. Can you believe it? Believe it...doubters.

Yesterday was a break day. Wednesdays there is no 7.15 class, because Mike apparently needs one day a week to sleep in. Pansy. Thursdays is open gym. Come when you want, do what you want...well...kind of.

I left my house earlier than usual, just because I was up. And when I'm up...I'm up. If I sit or lay back down...I'm down. I must choose. Today I chose up. On my way to the gym, my handy little iPhone notifies me that I've been tagged in CrossFit Zeal's album. Oh...joy. As we all well know, I'm BEAUTIFUL when I work out. I know...I know...be jealous...it's a gift. Well the first picture I see of myself is when I'm doing deadlifts. I had no idea he was taking pictures yesterday until after the workout. Yes...that's focus...winning!

So he posts these pictures, and there's one that's really great of me doing a deadlift. I look strong. But then I see my mouth. Well...I see my braces...then I notice my mouth. I make some seriously funny faces in the gym. Let's just say I'll never meet and date someone from the gym. They all think I have problems. Which I do...different story...different day. But the pictures kind of make me laugh. I walk in, and Mike is in the office, Paul is working out. I sit down in the office, and Paul walks in to show us a video. He achieved a PR in front squat. Awesome.

Once in the box, Paul is cleaning up, and he reminds Mike of his recent PR. He tells Mike, "that's more than I weigh, not more than you weigh, but more than I weigh." Oh...the quips he throws on Mike...I love.

Time to roll it out. I roll...Mike rolls a little too. And then I realize...I'm alone. Grrrrrreat. Having Mike's full attention in the box is one of the most unnerving things. When he can focus all his energy and attention on one person, you're in for it. So I start to stretch my hamstrings...he decides to help...again. Faaaaaaaantastic. This hurts...like hold your breath hurts. Makes my feet tingle hurts...so he lets up.

First thing to do today is one power clean plus one hang power clean plus one push jerk. This is one movement for today's sake. This is to be done every thirty seconds for ten minutes. Let me be clear about something...I can do these. Also...they are not pretty. For some reason, I can think about the form and what I'm supposed to do, but my body doesn't follow my minds instructions. My body kind of does its own thing. When I think about what I'm supposed to do, my body says, "oh screw that, here's how you do it". Fail.

So all the way through this ten minutes Mike and I are talking and trying to figure out how to get me to be better. He keeps me light at fifty eight pounds. He also yells at me to drop the weight. I have the worst habit of using more energy to set the bar down all nice and lady-like. Duh...I am a lady.

Before I tell you about the rest of the workout, I'll mention that I peeked at it last night. I saw inverted burpees on the list. I had no idea what that was, but Mike so kindly posted a video. I'll explain. You start facing the wall standing. You then squat, sit on the floor, roll on your back and bring your legs over your head to where they are either touching the floor or nearly touching the floor behind your head. You then roll back up onto your feet, and immediately do a handstand against the wall in front of you. That's one. Exactly. One.

The workout today is:

AMRAP 12

10 inverted burpees

10 toes to bar (seriously?!?)

10 db thrusters

The most dreaded part of this to me is toes to bar. Ugh. Whatever. You must work at what you're weakest at...*rolls eyes*. He has me try out each movement a few times to make sure I'm capable.

3...2...1...

Inverted burpees go alright on the first set. Then toes to bar. Toes to bar just mentally defeats me. I allow it, I know, but it just gets me. The first two my toes don't hit the bar. So naturally, I don't count them. Mike then tells me to get my feet as high as I can. He also tells me not to be so negative on the blog as to how I couldn't get my toes to the bar. He also mentions that if I mastered kipping this would be easier. Funny, I was trying not to swing. Damn.

Then db thrusters. These hurt by now. They shouldn't because I'm only using fifteen pound dumbells. But they do nevertheless.

On the second set of inverted burpees, I hit my head on the floor once pretty hard. I didn't like it. That's when Mike starts picking on how I get up. Wonderful. Now I have head trauma and I look funny. Again, the joys of being the only one in the gym with Mike.

As twelve minutes come around, I've done three rounds, and get in twelve extra reps. Sheesh. I'll have you know that a wall, a pull up bar, and a set of fifteen pound dumbells kicked my ass today. That's it. No fancy equipment, no treadmill, no pretty wall colors, no tv. Just a wall, a pull up bar, and a set of fifteen pound dumbells. It's the simplest things in CrossFit that will test your drive.

After the workout, Mike tries to teach me kipping. I'm not bad at it. Then I try toes to bar while kipping. It was like the sky parted and Mike bestowed a secret unto me. Kipping is awesome. So...now that I have kipping down...why not try a pull up with my body weight. I've accomplished one big goal earlier this week when I squatted my body weight, why not try the other one.

Almost.

Kipping helps, and Mike says I'm close. But I can't get to the top today without his help. No worries...I'll try again when I'm fresh.

Today was a good day.

I'm baaaaaaaaaaack

Yep...so I've been M.I.A. Or L.I.A. Lazy in action? Wait...............

Anyway...two weeks ago I went once that week. Last week I went once that week. I've slacked off. However, I went yesterday AND today.

Disappointed in me? No more than I am, I can assure you. Mike reminded me yesterday how ironic the title of the blog was...yea yea...I get it!!!

Two weeks ago...I can't really remember what my workout was.

Last week...can't remember either. It's written down somewhere, but my legs and back refuse to allow me to get up from my chair to retrieve it.

We started out like we always do...foam rolling. This is the only calm time I have, until Mike gets a hold of me. He decided to "help" me roll today. And by "help", I mean torture. I mean, I was sweating while he was pushing my leg into the roller. It was bad. At least he got a few laughs out of it. That's what I get for telling him I don't feel something, or that something is easy. Never. Again.

We did low bar back squats today for our strength portion. It was supposed to be four sets of five each, increasing weight each time. But Mike decided that since I didn't get to work up to my one rep max last week, today was the day. I was NOT prepared for this.

I worked up to 113. That was tricky. Not impossible, but tricky to maintain form while still squatting my body weight. But it worked, and Mike didn't have to help me. At least I don't think. He was spotting me. I think he was more worried I would damage his gym than myself. Winkie face.

Once 113 was finished I thought I was done. Nope. Mike slapped five more pounds on. Keep in mind, I weigh about 114 pounds. This is more than my body weight now. I've always wanted to do this, but always been scared to. No turning back now. Nerves set in. This is the point when I start to psych myself out. I start to think, "you're going to drop this", "you're going to fail", "you're going to get hurt". All these things. I know, right? How dare I treat myself this way?

All the while thinking all these things, part of my brain kicked in and shut them up, and just said, "do it". Simple as that. Mike was there to spot if I really couldn't...and worst case...I drop the weight (I hope). I have a problem dropping weights in the gym...they make quite the racket. Anywho...I did it. It felt like it took an eternity to get it back up, but it did it. It was ugly, and it was hard, but it worked!

Then I put the bar back...and Mike said, "let's just stick with 115 for your 1RM, that was an ugly 118." Good idea, Mike.

So today's WOD looked pretty simple.
5 rounds for time:
11 deadlifts
11 hand release push ups
11 v-ups

So naturally, Mike moves my bar from the squat rack to the floor. This bar is thirty three pounds, and has twenty five pound weights on each side. For those of you who struggle with math, that's eighty-three pounds. No biggie, I did a workout several weeks ago that had me doing eighty three pound deadlifts for seven reps at a time...eleven shouldn't be so bad. That was when Mike decided to ADD ten pounds. Sheesh.

Hand release push ups confused me at first...I thought by hand release he meant bring your hands off the ground at the top, basically jumping off your hands, I was wrong, thankfully. Hand release push ups are when you get your chest on the ground, you pull your hands up off the floor. I needed a red band for assistance here. Thirty pounds of help makes a world of difference. Then there was the v-up. No biggie, I did these in high school all the time. *rolls eyes*

The workout begins. The first set isn't so bad until I get to the v-ups. I kept over-compensating on them and almost falling over. It was quite comical. But then I got the hang of it. Second round is getting more in the swing. Third round is when it starts to hurt...a lot.

Fourth round is when you think...only one more of each of these. And it feels like you've been doing this forever, and you look at the clock and it's less than eight minutes that has gone by. The last set seems like it will never end. The deadlifts get heavier and heavier each time you try to pick up the bar, the push ups feel like Mike is sitting on your back, and the v-ups feel like your abs are tearing and your legs don't want to come off the ground.

TIME!!!!!

10.49.

After I catch my breath and drink some water, I walk over to the board...and Mike wrote down 10.50. Oh...I don't think so. I told him about his mistake, he decides to leave it there since it bothers me so much.

Thanks, Coach.

There is a moral to all this rambling. The moral is that even if you fall off your wagon...don't give up. Slacking for two weeks is disappointing, but it's not a failure. Nobody judges you but yourself, and Mike if you're at CrossFit Zeal. You are your own worst critic. Everyone in the gym just goes to work out, they aren't there to pass judgement on who's there and who isn't. So go back...if it's been a week...or a month...go back!!!

My body is thanking me right now for going back in fact. It's causing me to walk a little funny, to grunt when I squat down to grab files, to take a breath and grimace a little when I get out of my chair, and stretch every five minutes to avoid getting stuck in one position. Other people wonder why you do it to yourself...they wonder why you smile when you're in pain. But those of us who are crazy enough to smile at the pain know that it's our body's way of thanking us for the work we've done. Thanking us for treating it with respect, for wanting to push it to the limit, to test what it can do.

Have I mentioned that I see changes already? My stomach is more tone, my legs are stronger, they are firmer, my arms are starting to cut up a little, and I feel more confident? I don't really weigh any different, but who cares? I didn't start this to lose weight, I started it to feel better. And hell...looking better is a bonus for me. The reason I started was to be able to do things like squatting my body weight today...and in a few short weeks I've gotten there. I'm already accomplishing things I've only dreamed about doing until now.

Start today...there's no better time.